Irritated again

I do notice that I’ve been reading a lot lately and I think it’s my way of escaping reality because I’ve just been so irritable and easily annoyed and you know even today my hubby and I have gotten into another little disagreement or something because of what we were going to eat.

I usually stop eating around 6 PM  he will eat a little later if he’s hungry but I’m trying to lose weight so I don’t eat very late and if I do its something extremely light …Anyway needless to say we were both hungry but he started nitpicking about what there is to eat… around where I live there are only three choices McDonald’s, a pizzeria or Chinese food and this is what we have all the time so we got into a little something and just him nagging me and getting cranky about him being hungry really just irritated me I mean I’m hungry too but I’m not catching an attitude about it ugh…

i’ve been feeling like this for the last few days because he’s even been asking me what’s wrong…  I can’t tell him you’re starting to irritate me, or you’re irritating me because my husband is very sensitive and then he will spend the whole day not talking to me and I don’t want that either… I just want him to stop being such a nag… it’s my day off and I’m starting to think if I want to even continue having the same days off as him because I do like spending time with him but once he starts nagging and getting cranky I just want to escape.. it’s gotten to a point where even his voice becomes annoying…

I finished a big thick book in about a week and a 1/2 I’m starting another one so it’s like I can just escape and then he will just talk and talk and talk noticing that I’m reading and he will still talk and I don’t want to be rude or anything so I stopped reading and i listen to what he’s saying… give him a one or two word answer and go on my way … reading…  he knows that something is wrong and I just don’t know how to tell him that you been annoying me lately and I don’t know what to say or how to say it or anything like that…

i dont know… could i be hypomanic… because honestly.. i’m only annoyed with him… and it’s like he will do anything in his power for us to stay home… i want to go out with him and do things but he will just say anything to stay home… ugh… that’s another thing that frustrates me… i mean i cant even masterbate to relieve stress cause he’s always around… i dont know…. i’m just nuts…



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