I KNEW IT!

so this morning something about hubby looked a little extra nice… so i asked “are you going out tonight?” he tells me no.. he didnt feel like going out but if his friends want to hang out he said he would because one of his friends is going through a divorce… so just to be supportive… but you know what… i already knew and had a feeling he was going to go out… lol he thinks i’m stupid…

i honestly feel like stopping by the bar that he goes to… what if hes’ not with his friends… i know i probably wont see him tonight because he dont usually get home until late… i should probably get to sleep soon anyway… it’ll make the time go faster… but i just ate so i’m not going to bed until about 10…

i just hate being alone…for a few reasons but i just want to get to the bottom of the main issue… why do i hate being alone…? i still dont know… maybe cause i’m alone with my thoughts… maybe because i’m bored… maybe cause i feel like my time is being wasted.. i mean i cooked and cleaned the house and i’m a bit hypo manic today… i want to go out and socialize but at the same time i dont want to go anywhere… ugh… sometimes i drive myself crazy…