Guilt!

So i woke up today and decided NOT to go to work today… not for any other reason other than the fact that i didnt want to go in today… I woke up to hubby next to me but we did have a rough night… we really didnt sleep too well because our dog kept waking us up.. i think she’s in heat…

so now i’m feeling guilty about calling out… i dont call out often… last i called out was on April 7th… but i just dont know why i’m feeling bad about it… it’s going to be a great and beautiful day out here in NYC but i’m not going anywhere… i’m just staying home maybe watch movies and just bum it out today at home…

Hubby left for court because we are having problems with rent and he wanted me to go with him and i didnt feel like going anywhere but he HAD to go…he wants me to experience what he goes through but i just didnt want to go… so yeah feeling guilt about that cause he’s already gone..i know he wanted my support and i wasnt there…

i just have an overall bad feeling today… ugh… but with no particular reason… my boss loves me and he knows that i havent been feeling well so i’m sure he believes me being sick but still… i’m actually ok today.. just didnt feel like going anywhere…

a part of me wants to get dressed and go to work but i already know they have someone to take my place… they will be fine..

just a bad feeling…

i’m going to invite my sister over so we can have a movie day/night… depending on when she comes over…

i’ve gained 3lbs so i’m kinda stressed about that as well… yesterday i had some chicken and veggies as well as a chicken wrap with onions… this morning all i had was an orange and i’m hungry…but i’m not going to eat anything right now.. i need to drop these 3lbs… maybe it’s cause aunt flo is on her way but still… ugh…

hoping to feel better as the day progresses…

6 comments

  1. I know it’s easy to say, but try not to dwell on the guilt. I find it to be a waste of an emotion. It’s destructive and you can’t do much with it positively speaking. What’s done is done, just try and make the day your own by doing something productive with it. Even if that means just taking a bath and pampering yourself to soothe your mood. All the best! xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Oh man, I used to feel the same way when I was working. Like you said, they even have someone to cover for you so don’t sweat it. Even being legitimately sick I’d still feel guilty. I think it just shows that you’re a good and loyal employee. Hugs and now go chill and try to enjoy your mental health day πŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

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